Judge Not

A group of us here in Ashland are getting excited about our upcoming training in Nonviolent Communication this weekend. In preparation, we’re reading a book by the same title by Marshall Rosenberg, who developed this methodology in the 1960s and 1970s. 

Nonviolent Communication teaches us to be observant, to see and withhold judgment. This is the first step in NVC, but it’s crucial, especially when it comes to communication that in some way hopes to bring resolution with another person: to mitigate a conflict, to deescalate a situation, to alter some destructive or distressing behavior. Rosenberg emphasized that many conflicts escalate because people confuse observation with evaluation (judgment). When we mix in judgments, interpretations, or labels, the other person often feels criticized and becomes defensive.